10 Things a man can do at Wal-Mart while his wife is taking her sweet old time:

10 Things a man can do at Wal-Mart while his wife is taking her sweet old time:

1. Get 24 boxes of condoms & randomly put them in peoples carts when they aren't looking.
2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5 minute intervals.
3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in Housewares . . . and see what happens.
4. Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
5. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
6. Look right into the security camera, use it as a mirror and pick your nose.
7. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.
8. Dart around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the theme from "Mission Impossible."
9. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!"
10. Go into a fitting room, shut the door and wait a while and then yell loudly "There's no toilet paper in here!"